Talkity-talk-talk-talk

This is for all the new people who have added me. You dumb bastards.

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Why I Got a Livejournal: My friends seemed to laugh at my jokes and amusing stories, so I figured I'd spread the love to the internet!

Favourite Movie: A Clockwork Orgy, Batman in Robin, Star Trek: The Next Penetration, Shaving Private Ryan, Toy Story 2

Zodiac Sign: I'm a fucking guy, a fucking guy who doesn't believe in astrology, fate, or karma. Do you think I know this?

How "Big:" Not small, but not big enough to brag about, either :(

Current Place of Residence: Moronto, Onterrible

College: Osama bin Laden's School of Witchcraft and Wizardry

Occupation: Man-whore

Marital Status: Single. As you read on, it will become painfully obvious why.

Life Goals: To be a journalist who parties with celebrities and writes witty op/eds. If that fails, cage fighter, Sniper for JTF2, or lead singer of a Norwegian Satanic Black Metal Band

Favourite Book: Harry Potter and the Time he Got Lost at Wal-Mart, Harry Potter and the Time he Questioned his Sexuality, Harry Potter and the Time he Sold his Soul to the Devil for a Klondike Bar......

Favourite Food: Free food. Unless it's cheesy or the Pizza from Dominion; I do not care much for those things at all.

Favourite Drink: Alexander Keith's, even though their former spokesman is in jail for jerking his cocktail weenie to kiddie porn.

Least Favorite Drink: Mountain Crest Beer. There is a reason why it is only $1.00 and advertised as Canada's cheapest beer. That is because farmers will sell watered down horse piss for anything.

Favourite Hobbies: I like to pee in swimming pools, prank call the Government and get in shoot outs with gangs.

Favourite Outdoor Activity: Urinating in inappropriate places, running around naked, hunting for bigfoot with a machete, being one with nature basically

Favourite TV Show: Canadian Parliament, CBC Newsworld, BBC World News, and anything on Showcase after midnight

Favourite TV Character: Homer. Oh, and Spongebob. I mean, come on...

Favourite Holiday: I very much enjoy celebrating the birth of Idi Amin, even though you have no idea who that is. (Hint: He's an asshole).

Favourite Athlete: The boxer who punched out Muhammad Ali in one hit. What was his name? I'd like to say me. Seriously, I forget his name.

Favorite Celebrity: Ozzy. If I ever end up dating a girl named Sharon one day, hehehe....

Favourite Song Ever: Anything by Rush. Rush is the only non-metal band I listen to, and it is the shit. Anything in life can be related to a song by Rush.

Favourite Colour: This can't seriously be a question. Why would anyone care?

Favourite Month: This is starting to get stupid.

Favourite Day of the Week: I will delete this thing if this bullshit continues. Who wrote this thing? I don't even remember where I got it from!

Turn-ons: Okay, now we're back on track! Hot women, cute women, attractive women, funny women, and redheads.

Turn-offs: Men, women who look like men, women who used to be men.

Scariest Experience: Going onto the highway for the first time. I don't know who wanted to crap themselves more; me or the driving instructor.

There you go, and welcome aboard!